I'm so mommy and I don't even know it

Things I have uttered in the past:
I don't know if I'll ever have kids. (we have 3)
I don't care what my circumstances, there would just never be a situation in which I would ever consider owning a minivan. (Nissan Quest, thankyouverymuch)
If I DID have kids I would probably remove all the televsions, or at the very least limit the amount to 1/2 hour per day. (no comment)
I don't understand why people let their kids eat junk. Just don't have it in the house and only offer healthy foods. (of course it's that simple)
All you need to do is set an expectation level for your kids and they will meet those expectations. (ummm... really? every time?)
Ahhh hubris. Bites you in the butt every time. Or in less tactful terms, young me was a real dumbass!
And let me add that if your youngin' vomits on you and then proceeds to poo in your bed and you still want to snuggle up with her stinky little body and in fact, don't think twice about it, well then I think you've earned your mommy badge for sure. In fact I think there ought to be something like "Mommy Scouts." You would earn badges through various achievements such as sleepless nights in infancy, first trip to the hospital, pulling off a great birthday party, etc. And stepmoms would get a special sash because that takes some extra special skills. That way we would get some well deserved props. What do you think, mommies?

Comments

[Betsy]

Phi must have been bitten by the same bug that bit Jack this week--he's never thrown up before and was so scared and upset, poor guy. I couldn't even worry that he had thrown up *on ME*. I love this post and totally agree about the mommy badges. It is so hard sometimes and a little tangible proof of all you have gotten through already would be a nice reminder!

Also, I have to laugh about the things you said before you had kids. I am so there. I find that my husband still says things like this sometimes: it's easy to be an idealist when you are not at home 24/7 dealing with reality!

Hope your little pumpkin is feeling better soon.

[africankelli]

This is not good. I sound like the young you. I don't have kids.
Holy hell. :)
Actually, I'd like to have four, five, six kids! Bring it on!

[Eren]

He, he...I resemble your post. And YES!!!! Mommy Scounts, Im in! Can I be the treasurer? Kelli, your comment cracks me up! I wanted 4 and Sergio wanted none...we ended up with 3 (for now). Its messy, but it pays big in the hugs and snuggles dept. (even if they may be a little stinky at times).

[sarah]

I've had the "you know you are a mommy" discussion lots of times, and it always seems to come back to vomit, doesn't it?

My "personal best" - catching it in my bare hands. Yes, I did. I don't even know WHY. Thank god she's only puked a handful of times ever. I don't want to know what I'm capable of!

[PlainJane]

I'm not even a mom, but I think that the Mommy Scouts is a GREAT idea!

[stacy]

..give me some knuckles. :) (which is what my gal tells me when I do something good). I let go of my "ideals" too.... And, now I just aim to do the best I can.

[beki]

Oh boy, when I think back at some of the things I said before I had kids, or even when I only had 1 kid, I cringe! I do things now I never thought I would do. But hey, with kids, you've got to go with the flo :)

[Ali]

Oh Mommy Scouts - can I join, pleeeease!

I'm with Sarah - I shocked myself by earning the 'catch the vomit in your bare hands' badge.

Currently working on my potty training badge. We could do with a few laughs!

[Sarah]

Even sick Phi is scrumptious. I think so and I'm not even her mommy! I can't wait until I have my own little to poop and puke on me. Though, that's not really the part I'm most looking forward to, but at least I'm not as adverse to it as I once was.

[mo]

I love the idea of mommy scouts! I want a vest full of patches to wear so that when I forget that I am actually doing o.k., I can put that baby on and feel proud of myself. I would have to wear it in the house alone though, because that would look goofy. I saw a bumper sticker once that said, "I was a much better parent before I had kids". True true true!

[madmommy]

Ok, we really need to do this Mommy Scouts thing! And I suppose the daddies get badges too, like first poopy diaper changed voluntarily!
I had to smile at your "pre-mommy-isms" that sounded so familiar! How about "I'll never give my kid candy to keep him quiet" (unless I'm grocery shopping and still have 8 aisles to go lol)

[raesha]

What a fabulous post! I am SO into earning the Mommy Scouting merit badges...my proudest one had been being brave in front of my daughter when she had to have over 40 stitches in her face after being bit by a dog.

[Erin]

My husband and I really knew all about parenting before we had our son--we knew just exactly what everyone else was doing wrong, why their kids were out of control, etc. Now, we just learn as we go along! Boy do we feel dumb sometimes. Great post.

[Maureen]

Boy, this post speaks eons! I've never really caught vomit ~ likely because my kids tend to run when vomiting, just so everything gets a good clean! I'm sure I'd get other badges!

[bitter Betty]

That would be so cool.
Parent Teacher conference badge.
Multi Kid Sleepover badge.
The opportunities to celebrate parenting milestones are so endless!